I am not the most decisive person. snicker all you want (you know who you are). i think the indecisiveness comes from a lot of places - wanting to experience everything, anxiety about the unknown, worrying about the response i'll get from other people, not feeling like i know yet just quite who i am. whatever the underlying cause, i tend to do lots of research, think big, and stick to pretty much the same old thing. i've had some pretty impressive breakthroughs: going to byu, studying abroad, going on a mission, moving to houston for graduate school. firm, solid decisions that have huge impacts on my life. thought out, made, followed through.
and now i've come to another decision. its the time of year for PhD applications, but i've been feeling a tug in another direction. a tug i've felt since i was maybe 15 years old. the peace corps. i knew then that i would need a bachelor's degree (check!). by the time that happened i had a testimony and knew i needed to go on a mission (check!). and now here i am working on my masters in public health in houston and i am now qualified to do it.
as the thought began, once again, to creep into my head so did lots of questions. what will my family think? will i be able to do it? can i handle another two years away? possibly no electricity, running water? what will it mean professionally? how hard will it be for me to learn another language? can i handle that much responsibility? what about spending two years with people and then never seeing them again? and so many many more questions. i've thought about them. i've considered, written out, balanced, weighed, talked over, and prayed about it. and i know that i am supposed to spend 27 months as a peace corps volunteer.
i talk a big game: sustainability, service, prevention, etc. this is an opportunity for me to practice what i preach. my education as a public health professional will hopefully be useful in some far flung corner of the world, because those people there desire health and opportunity and hope. and if i can be a small part of bringing that to them...shouldn't i?
this wasn't a decision entered into lightly. there is an impressively governmental application and placement process ahead of me. but it's right for me if i'm right for them. and who wouldn't want me :)
and now i've come to another decision. its the time of year for PhD applications, but i've been feeling a tug in another direction. a tug i've felt since i was maybe 15 years old. the peace corps. i knew then that i would need a bachelor's degree (check!). by the time that happened i had a testimony and knew i needed to go on a mission (check!). and now here i am working on my masters in public health in houston and i am now qualified to do it.
as the thought began, once again, to creep into my head so did lots of questions. what will my family think? will i be able to do it? can i handle another two years away? possibly no electricity, running water? what will it mean professionally? how hard will it be for me to learn another language? can i handle that much responsibility? what about spending two years with people and then never seeing them again? and so many many more questions. i've thought about them. i've considered, written out, balanced, weighed, talked over, and prayed about it. and i know that i am supposed to spend 27 months as a peace corps volunteer.
i talk a big game: sustainability, service, prevention, etc. this is an opportunity for me to practice what i preach. my education as a public health professional will hopefully be useful in some far flung corner of the world, because those people there desire health and opportunity and hope. and if i can be a small part of bringing that to them...shouldn't i?
this wasn't a decision entered into lightly. there is an impressively governmental application and placement process ahead of me. but it's right for me if i'm right for them. and who wouldn't want me :)
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